August 8, 2009: I was here.

I don't know how to really describe the mood I'm in right now, I guess I'm fighting to keep my dream alive. Better yet fighting to keep high hopes during monotonous and mundane times. Right now, like all I do is work. I have two jobs and idk man like it feels like i rarely get to do what I want to do. During the days I don't have to work, I have to spend a certain amount of it catching up on rest. Now, I'm not complaining; I mean there are plenty of people out in the world that would die to be in my position. I just want to start experiencing something new, lately days have been kinda strange I guess. I mean when I was a kid I had a completely different vision for what life was going to be like ya know. For instance, have you ever waited anxiously for something because you thought that "something" was just gonna put you over the top and make you so happy and then you got that "something" and it didn't live up to your expectations. Thats the reality that I'm fighting right now with life. I'm fighting to keep the motivation I've always had for life, ya know the hope of "I have great things in store for me in the future". I don't know maybe this is just some phase I'm going thru, so if that's the case I thinks it's best that I KEEP GOING. I won't and can't stay living a monotonous hum drum lifestyle. I mean life is just so precious and so rich. I suppose that one day I'll look at this and laugh, I'll chalk it up to the period in my life where I had to learn a thing or two and it wasn't fun to go through. Well, I gotta get goin man, I got some planning to do and all that good stuff. Take care and God bless!